Why do I always have to change for others?
It's so fucking irritating.
It's like, "Amanda change this, Amanda, change that! And this and that and this and hat!"
I mean, not literally.
But you get the meaning.
Instead of pinpointing on how other should change,
why not just reflect and see what YOU have to change about yourself -.-
I have to take so many precautions, so that I won't offend you.
It's so tiring.
I'm not even fucking being myself.
Fuck you.

Am I living life well?
I get worried over every little thing.
As long as they have got to do with friends.
Friendship is taking up so much of me.
So much that I have barely enough energy to care about the issues that are more or equally worth caring about.
Like.. my family, my studies.
Friendships are sucking all of my energy away from my lifeless body.
I can't believe how pathetic I've become.
As long as one friend doesn't reply my message or in msn, my mood will go all the way down.
Then I get so pessimistic, depressed, sensitive and paranoid.
I can actually get so fucking estatic to have my friend joking with me hyper-ly.
How pathetic.
Life shouldn't be led the way I'm leading it.
But.. I just can't control myself..